A wonderful life...

When I hear the attendant come on the radio and say something about turbulence I looked outside my window.  I could now start to feel plane jerk and creak with each move the pilot makes.  When I look out my window again, I know this will be an adventure.  Knowing that this was just a short trip but I know that not only my life will change but everyone's.  People will look back and wonder what we all thought and how we felt.

The clouds up here were pillows of silk who knew that down below we're fields and storms.  Up here we all were one with different stories and backgrounds.  I make small talk to the man beside me to distract myself from the churning stomach of mine. He is from California he asked where I was going. I lie and tell him home when really I'm going somewhere that I hope will not be my last destination. I have a feeling that he sees right past this and turn my head to look out my window again.  This time I notice a small break in the cloud cover and see a housing development.  I wonder if they even know we are up here.  I looked out further than just right out my window and see a cloud shaped like a mountain and beside that and ice cream cone with whip cream on top.  I wish I had food other than the small twisted hard dough that they wish to call a pretzel. The man beside me now is reading the bible I peek in the bible is a piece of paper that reads "stay clam and love God." I take this as God's way of saying everything will be alright.  The man comes on the radio again saying we will land within twenty. My heart leaps and then sinks back into my stomach.  I hate when we land almost as much as when we take off.  When we land everyone grabs their stuff like a lion pouncing on its prey. I sit and watch people leave and act like we don't know each other and never see each other again. I thank God for his message to stay calm, I will need it.

Military men and women coming home and leaving again. You can tell who the spouses and parents are when you see them.  On the next flight I sit beside a man that has been well for better of a word seasoned in the flying experience. He has the pillow, the headphones, the laptop, and no carry on.  He stays to himself and I'm happy about that; I have no need to make small talk with him and if I did he wouldn't know what I was saying anyway.  A few rows up I hear a baby laugh and I see one sleeping in the isle across from me.  This flight is cold unlike the first where it was steaming hot.  The clouds are clear, but I have a feeling that this will change. I can see the wing better on this flight also.  I love sitting next to the wing I can it move and always wonder how far we have come from from the first plane. This flight is the shortest I have been on with it only being 55 minutes long. All of the flight attendants are of Asian decent and speak English as if they were born here.  The one in red has a decent sense of humor telling people to lay down and sleep if they have the row to themselves.  As I look out of the window the sky has went completely white and that let's me know we are close to our destination.  It makes me wonder how they know where and how they are going and getting to where we need to go.

I still have not ate for the fear of being sick on a plane.  It is a wonder how I survive sometimes. The thought of landing makes me sick once again, but not as much as what will happen next. Getting my luggage. This is a struggle in itself for me since I weight as much as my luggage and it is as big as I am. People seem to not care and they watch you fight to get it off of the never-ending belt that rotates.  I don't know why they call it a baggage claim they should call it a workout while away from home. I'm sure the security personnel get a kick out of us doing this, they have a sick sense of humor.  Those that decide to pack their house, myself included, watch people pick everything up with ease. I hope that I will survive and not end up on the belt.  This time I have rented a car and we will see how this works out.  I drive a mid size car and the they have graciously provided us an SUV.  Not that I need it but with doing what I am doing my return trip well....it will be hell on earth. I will need the space in the car.

Every now and then I get a peek at the world below and it reminds me that we are part of something bigger.  What that something bigger is I have yet to find out.  I have many questions and it seems like no answers.

I hear the landing gear; this sound is the best knowing that I'm just a few short moments of being where I belong. This trip is hard for many reasons none that I can get into but not just for me but for a lot of people. It is bittersweet knowing what is going to happen.  Being me it isn't easy but I wouldn't have it another way. As I look down at the town below I wonder if that is where my husband is and hope he will return to.  I am happy for the experience that he has provided us with and everyday is different.  Many ask why I do this, the truth is I don't have to I want to.  I get to fall in love everyday and who wouldn't want that. See different places meet new people and try new things.  This is a dream and a nightmare rolled into one happy family.  This is our twisted happiness...kinda like my pretzel on my first flight.  Sometimes this life is hard, a little salty, sometimes twisted, but in the end it is wonderful.